Mortgage Maven Pillows

'You're part of the 6% we won't be lending money to...'

'You talked about 'Fannie Mae' in your sleep again!'

"Can we close before the next Fed meeting?"

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

'I'm coming off a fixed-rate mortgage.'

"You've heard of the bank that likes to say 'yes' well we're the bank that likes to laugh in your face unless you've got an 80% deposit."

'I didn't know my mortgage was THAT adjustable!'

"How much do we owe them?"

'Why are more homeowners walking away from their mortgages?'

'I wouldn't describe you as a 'first time buyer', I'd say you were more of a 'no chance buyer'.'

BUS, 'I've got all my money tied up in securitized mortgages or mortgaged securities -- I forget which.'

Bank goes back to cheap toasters as free gift.

The Bank Bogey Man

Delinquent Home Owners

"Bloody building society keeps hassling us about the mortgage payment."

"It's me again... Freddie Mac!"

'We don't approve of mortgages.'

"Good news! The economy is staging a comeback..."

'It's a house repossession wave.'

"Sorry, Bob. You can't refinance when you are upside-down on your home."

"This place has a water view if you're looking at the mortgage."

"Polly want a comprehensive overhaul of the subprime mortgage lending industry!"

Your mortgage has been approved. Now you'll see just how fast a month can fly by.

'Well, we've been talking about downsizing, and it looks like the bank is going to make sure we do.'

"Throw in one of those brochures about refinancing my home."

'What do you mean you've done more for me than my mother did?'

Stan believes in calling a spade a spade.

I have a dream.

Coming soon: Compulsory auction because of unpaid mortgage

"The process of phoning lenders can be a little confusing..."

It doesn't matter if our house is made out of bricks, we've got a sub-prime mortgage!

Loan trap

"Now I know many of you still have questions about reverse mortgages...."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."