Monday Morning Critic Mugs

'Play any other position besides Monday morning quarterback?'

"The bags under my eyes have combined to form some kind of face backpack."

Trump Poutine

"My favorite way to start the day...coffee, danish, and a data dump."

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."

Monday: Next 7 exits.

Rumors, lies and innuendo.

Getting through the week.

"If I've timed this right, symptoms should start at exactly 9 a.m. Monday."

It was getting harder and harder to stay psyched.

"What kind of politician would I be if I didn't politicize this crisis?"

"Political cartoons that make people think? Are you crazy? We don't want to distract our readers from the weather forecast, the horoscope and the advertisements!"

Continental Breakfast...$2.99: 'What continent is THIS supposed to represent?'

'If they're so darn 'fair and balance,' why are all the reporters people?'

"Three years running 'fake news' websites? You're just what we're looking for!"

"Tell me again. Is this guy the newsman or the newsmaker?"

Victims of War

"Doesn't it make sense to move Casual Friday to Monday?"

Lose the Iraq War.

LEV Trump

You know what I like best about fake news, Randy? It can be crazy and have shady sources and be obviously nothing but nonsense, and it'll still be believed. Like that fake story about Saddam Hussein and those weapons of mass destruction and stuff. Fake news is only "fake news" if it's not from people who say they're real news. You can't tell me Wolf Blitzer's beard is real.

Fake News, 50 cents.

"We'd better get over there. The morning coffee scrum has already started."

"Let him who is without 'spin' cast the first stone."

"This coffee seems a little staler every morning, Edwina!"

'You know Doug just isn't a morning person. This afternoon's not looking too good, either.'

"You should know better than to give a speech in the morning before you've had your coffee."

"To be perfectly frank, the preceding was a paid political bunch of lies."

'And now a look at tomorrow's front pages - the Telegraph leads with 'ultimate makeover guide', while the Mail has 'a fantastic new you'...'

"None of this news seems 'fit to print' to me!"

"My opponent will lead you to believe that I am a turnip..."

'Not only is it full of bad news - it's printed on your mother.'

Who reports on the reporters?

"The news you are about to see is fictitious and is shown merely for its sensational content."