Monastic Life Observer Pillows

Drunk Monk - Out of Order

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

Trappist Monk Discord

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"Of course, the actual honey is all made overseas."

Fire hydrant with regular or sparkling water

"No, it's not codependency. The neediness is just in one direction."

'Exams were harder before the Renaissance.'

"Many of us are worrying, Brother Daniel, that you've become too clothes conscious."

"Beats me how pregnancy has survived into the modern era. There's no reception desk, product guarantee nor customer service department!"

Trappist talk show.

"He was much more effective in the field."

"Closing averages on the human scene were mixed today. Brotherly love was down two points, while enlightened self-interest gained a half. Vanity showed no movement, and guarded optimism slipped a point in sluggish trading. Over all, the status quo remained unchanged."

Maternity Hospital

'Am I glad to be back - austerity's gone mad out there!'

"Shhh - he's trying open his third nostril."

'I believe you're thinking of leaving us, Brother?'

Amimated illuminated Manuscript

'I wish Brother Gregory would spend less time surfing the 'net.''

Mice 25¢

"And the tech guy said not to worry if I lost my phone. There's an app for that..."

"We'll have to retract that article. On of our co-authors is the night watchman."

"Your sister got another promotion."

"It was a scary few minutes but now I'm making a fortune as a motivation speaker."

I have a video phone and I'm not afraid to use it.

Old Yarns

"Someone just pinched my mobile phone"

'What is wrong with brother Sebastian?'

"Better safe than sorry, son."

"Auto reply: I am dead and will have limited access to e-mail."

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