Miracle-believer In Finance Prints

'Basically it's a stock that if a chain of near miraculous events would happen to occur, you'd make a bundle.'

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"But in my fantasy business league I'm making millions."

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

"I was a stockbroker first, but when I realized how much time I spent praying, I figured, what the heck?"

A likely story - lost his waterskis in a poker game !

'Some think we economic forecasters speak a lot of Mumbo Jumbo'

"And the Lord said, 'You know, it takes a ton of money to run a place like this.'"

School of Wizardry and Creative Accounting.

Man feeding fish banks with money, not food.

Wishful Thinking Magazine - circulation chart.

'I bet he gets a better rate of interest than me!'

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with out bank chaplain."

The Little Banker Bonus Pack

Wall St Baptist: 'Life is exactly like the stock market exchange and we each have our own portfolio to manage.'

"Holy water, holy water...."

I have a dream.

"Yeah, but good luck getting it peer-reviewed."

'Fish and bread? That's it? Seriously?'

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

"He put the 'fun' in funding."

"Your recovery has defied all known science...so let's just keep this between ourselves!"

'It's a medical miracle. According to your notes you should have been dead years ago!'

Lourdes - wheelchairs left behind.

'Church of the Divine Healing with an Emergency Room.'

Miracles on 34th Street.

'You had a good idea in our staff meeting yesterday. So, the church sent someone over to witness the miracle.'

'Hey, Naomi, remember last week when you said nothing short of a miracle could save MicroTechnoCom from bankruptcy?'

'I might be able to get you off if a chain of near miraculous rulings happen to occur.'

'Prof. Sigurdt has made giant strides in making genetic engineering profitable.'

"Typical. You don't even know what's impossible!"

"If you believe, clap your hands. Don't let our IPO die!"

"But my real dream is gettin' paid lotsa money for doin' nothin'."

'This is going to hurt, I'm afraid. . .I can't afford to pay.'