Mini Detectives Pillows

"I think oral sex is when they just talk about it."

"Before we can open it we need Mom's PIN number."

You Always Get to Be the Good Guy

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

A boy acting suspiciously

"I have a feeling he understands more than we think."

Man finishing painting through flap in door.

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

"First buttons, then zippers, now we learn to tie our shoes. Is mom trying to tell us something?"

'Your father installed a security system.'

'... Because it's the law! That's why!'

"I know it's the right thing to do, but if we call the cops this sandbox will be tied up for weeks."

'If that's the Police Station - we're not here!'

'Wait a minute! I think our line has been tapped.'

Kid to mom: 'How come I ask so many questions?'

'-But,son they couldn't put a horse in a box THAT size, could they?

'Please be quiet while the attempts to locate your head.'

'Mom, I swear it wasn't me! I didn't touch the cookies!'

'How do you measure the success of your blog?'

'I gather this is your first sting operation.'

"Perhaps you slept SLOWER than usual..."

'I'd love to tell who did it, but I'm protecting my source.'

"I've never met one, but I hear offices have fire drills."

"I've found Waldo. Now what?"

"Anything?"

'Next time I cut the red wire...'

'Do you have this in a smaller size?' - 'Is she nuts! She's way too big for that size. She'll destroy it if she tries it on...but if I don't answer her soon she'll destroy me...'

"Well, who's it from? I don't take blind submissions."

"I think this is the last year he'll believe in Father Christmas, he's asking a lot of questions"

'We found these spent cartridges at the scene Chief. Looks like it was Hewlett-Packard.'

Well, maybe you can find a do-it-yourself Youtube video showing a husband taking the clothes to the laundromat.

“The drain was plugged.”

'I can't wait to tell the vet what a great mouser you are.'

SANTA'S WORKSHOP, 'Kris, Kringle, Santa Claus, Father Christmas, Saint Nicholas -- if you're on the level, why all the aliases?'

"That new kid is taking hide-and-seek seriously...he's brought in bloodhounds!"