Mindfulness Apprentice T-Shirts

"Time's up. You must learn to let go."

'So far, I've cleared my mind of everything except Angelina Jolie.'

'First, you must empty your mind...'

Where your mind & battle are los

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

Work/Life Balance

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.

Turn, turn and turn.

Surfing the daily stress

"It's days like this that make me long for days like this."

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Fight or Flight

'Don't just sit there thinking. Meditate.'

What else is there to wish for?

'I love it here. It really floats my boat.'

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

"The goal is to hate yourself."

My God, I need to fart.

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

"When troubles begin to take their toll, it’s nice to take a little stroll!"

"Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?"

"I like you in that one—it gives you an aura of mindfulness."

Yoga.

"Well, if you're still awake when the time changes, you'll lose an hour of overthinking everything, too."

'Are we there yet? Huh? Have we achieved Nirvana yet? Huh, have we?'

"Have you ever thought of just knocking this 'half-empty glass' OFF the counter?"

A sturdy hand-hold against the vicissitudes of life: $1.00 per minute.

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

FIGHT STRESS: Walk-A-Thon

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

Meditation