Mindfulness Gifts

Optimist/Pessimist/Me

"I do count my blessings, but then I end up counting those of others who have more and better blessings, and that pisses me off."

"Try thinking about something else."

"You can accomplish anything, if you don't put your mind to it."

"Sorry, I can't talk right now. I'm busy living out the anxieties of a completely hypothetical situation."

"Exactly what is this 'nothing' I've been hearing so much about?"

Dream Small

"No way! It's definitely your turn to 'be one' with the dishes."

"Why did I come in here?"

A man ignores a cacophony and eats a sandwich.

Worried Too Much. Worries Too Little

"I want to learn to live in the moment... just not this moment. some other moment. Like a moment on the beach."

Think positive.

"Are we there yet?"

"Meditation is too hard. How do you keep one thought in your mind for this long?"

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

Meditator thinks about shoes and chocolate.

"What were you saying? My inner voice drowned you out for a second."

'My name is John and I haven't had a think for 36 days.'

'Remember...change comes from within.'

'One day, son, all this will be yours.'

Id/Ego/Superego.

'I'd really appreciate it if you'd refrain from shouting 'KA-CHING!!!' every time you become one with the universe.'

Think / Don't think signs.

"This week on 'The Amazing Race to Enlightenment,' can Jim and Suzy achieve right mindfulness? And will Barb and Candy be eliminated for relentless clinging to the self?"

Buddhist holds a sign reading 'The End is Insight.'

All we have in life is this moment...

'Pilates. Yoga. Maybe a new strain of tai chi. Whatever! We've got to end it before the entire herd is infected.'

'OK, be the ball, be the ball, be the ball'

Busy thoughts of people at a silent retreat.

'When did the world get into such a big hurry?'

"Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?"

"I'll leave you alone with your thoughts," she said. How cruel.

Mental Baggage Claim

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind and cashflow."