Military Planners T-Shirts

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"We only got six days of funding."

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

When Engineers Crack.

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

'We took the old plan, folded in half, and now it's the new plan.'

"I think you might need to start again."

Innovation & Calculation

"De l'huile bouillante, pas du fromage fondu!"

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

A cat is hiding in a block of cheese to lure a mouse out of its hole.

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

"Does it ever cross your mind that we make a lot of money because no one else wants to do what we do?"

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

Engineer on the move.

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

Father Time Management

"We're still trying to sort out the details."

Bad Office Planning

Clear construction agreements are important.

"I thought an illogical framework would work better."

Cat Day Planner.

"Well let`s see. It's going to be tight but I could squeeze you in for a walk at 1 pm."

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

Car insurance, breakdown cover, mobile insurance, home insurance, camera insurance... - 'Life insurance, health insurance, professional indemnity, and tax insurance.' - 'Let the bad times roll... heh, heh!'

"This better be important."

"Of course nobody can make head nor tale of it, but the good news is that it's been nominated for the Turner prize next year."

'Steve, I admire your determination to make this plan work.'

'Company planning department'

Office of Strategic Scenarios: 'Best case...Worst case.'

'I don't give a fig about 'relaxed planning regulations' it's got to come down.'

'Each company is making it hard to choose between merger offers.'

'And that's the quickest way out of the car park after the game.'