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'Avez-vous French toast?'

'That's it? It sounded a lot better in French.'

"We give it time to get its affairs in order...then 'whack!'"

'Today's special is yesterday's soup of the day!'

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

"The catch of the day is me."

'I'd appreciate it if you'd order the Chef's surprise. We don't get all that much excitement around here.'

"I see the businessman's lunch is up 50p."

'I take it sir is ready to order?'

'Could I just get one that's wine flavored?'

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

"While you were deciding, we raised our prices."

"We'll just have the loaves and fishes. . ."

Vegan Restaurant: ''amburgers! Sausages! RISSOLES!'

"No, thank you. I'd prefer seeing a menu from the restaurant across the street."

"Hmm... Do I get it?"

'Shall we bother with the sweet, chubby-chops?'

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'Greek restaurant?' 'No, menu upside down.'

'Hi, I'm Leo. How's the food here?'

"Don't mind me... just checkin' out the menu."

"I don't care how it's pronounced, I want it."

"I'm not a food critic I'm a literary critic and I've found the prose on your menu to be second-rate."

"Tonight's menu comes on ermine-white period-style paper, 260g/m2, hand-written in iron gall ink, available to take home for a discretionary supplement of £12.50."

'What the blue blazes is a 'tunerfish' sam'wich!?'

'What's this supposed to mean? -- 'Soup du jour a la yesterday'?'

"Are you sure this is the Irish guacamole?"

'Chef's salad as ordered.'

"We call it 'dish' of the day, but it's actually served on a plank of wood."

"The red wine sauce... what vintage is that?"

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"Well, what's your recommendation?"

"How do I know if it's fresh?... You asked for 'the soup of the day'. You didn't specify what day."

"Veal or non-veal?"

"What would you recommend for someone who's wealthy?"