Melodic Joker Mugs

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

Night of the Latkes

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

"April Fools'! You should’ve seen the look on your face!"

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

"How about we write a song combining Brexit with unrequited love?"

'Hey, Baby! How would you like to kiss the frog formerly known as 'Prince'?'

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

'...And do you John take Jennifer to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold, to write off on your taxes?'

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

Santa's Helpers

'When she walks in she lights up the room...' 'It's living next to the nuclear plant.'

'Half o' mild and a bag of pork scratchings - you're grooming me, aren't you?'

"Maybe we should just let heaven and nature sing."

"I'll give you a big wet kiss.. "

Sunshine and exercise. Are you glad I suggested we go for a walk?

"The spare sack? After a million warm beers and pieces of fruit cake...you'd have a spare sack too!"

"Out, damn'd Spot, out I say! Ha Ha Ha Ha!"

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

'How do I know if you've been naughty or nice? CCTV!!'

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

'The most moving part, for me, is when they explain how to fuse the main pipe to the power hose.'

Man playing with echos: 'Hellooooo...How are you....I love you...' 'I'm not ready for that kind of committment!'

'Yup, cannon in D.'

'I'm surprised the boss isn't in here checking up on us!'

'Sorry...you're not quite right for the position.'

Ice-Cube-IV

"Hold still, it's a programme about making your own tv cabinet."

'Good book?'

Santa Claws...

'If you ask me, toys are getting far too realistic!'

"Come on guys, my jokes aren't that bad!"

"She won't be long, I'm just putting her face on."

Adult Absence Notes.