Medicine Meme Lover Mugs

'Good morning, here's your placebo, I mean medicine... well, I'm fired.'

'We, first, I'll think we'll cut back on those muscle relaxants!'

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"If you'd only come to me sooner I wouldn't have had to go to lunch."

'I want to forewarn you that my HMO won't approve any treatment that uses a needle.'

Providing Healthcare For All

"All my symptoms are old ... "

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Because we dismissed his original self-diagnosis, he wants to give us his second opinion."

"Boy, do we hate to see this... I'm afraid your child's entire body is an 'innie'."

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

"I think it stopped breathing."

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'Who wants to be examined first?'

Happy Birthday to you.

'My boyfriend's a Cardiologist.'

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

'Your 'bad' cholesterol levels are right off the chart.'

'The doctor says he's going to have to give you a few more tests...'

I just hope my doctor is not on twitter too!

'We'll need to run some preliminary tests to see if you're healthy enough for more invasive follow-up tests.'

"Tut tut. You're only having a baby, if you had my flu last week you'd know what real pain was."

"You'll feel a pinch and then a burn."

'Could you be more specific than you feel zucky?'

Operating Room Humor. Why are anesthesiologists assumed to be honest? Because numb-ers don't lie!

"She keeps getting a stitch in her side."

'Time for your pills.'

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."