Medical Benefits Coordinator Pillows

'The Botox will help me to kiss up to the Boss.'

'The position carries no salary, just healthcare coverage.'

"I've written the employees' benefit manual in invisible ink"

Labor Day '19

"You're entitled to ten sick days, five personal days and four complete do-overs."

'Yes we do have health benefits, but read the fine print. You're only allowed to get sick once every three years.'

"The aspirin there is your medical benefit and here is your vision benefit."

"It's important to see 'beyond the obvious' when you look at a customer. . ."

OK, so maybe we've all overscheduled our kids a little.

"I'm sorry, Mr Percival, but what you've got is not economically treatable."

'Your employer's health plan automatically cancels your coverage once you get sick.'

'I can't give you a raise, Milhouse, because I'm going broke supplying you with health care.'

Walk the dog.

'We're going to wander in the desert for forty years? What about portability of benefits?'

"There's a one-year don't-get-sick probation period for our health insurance."

"Putting a trampoline in the breakroom to inspire fitness wasn't one of my best ideas."

"Your disgust over ballooning healthcare costs is just a natural part of the aging process."

"My doctor told me to avoid any unecessary stress, so I didn't open his bill."

'Oh yeah, our people will just fall over themselves to get transferred to this office.'

'Well here's the problem. #AB5 is a Nuclear Missile. # AB6 is a box of surgical gloves.'

'Since the cuts this is what we get instead of an incapacity benefits officer.'

'I'm here to offer you the company's free preventive health counseling...DON'T GET SICK OR ELSE!'

Companies are slashing employee health care and pension benefits. Cutting, slashing, trimming, eliminating. Look at them go. I feel like I'm watching a great athlete on tv. I'm so inspired! You're one odd duck. Rudy – come hither my overpaid dumpling!

'Hello, is that the temp agency? Now listen, I specifically asked for Elves!'

"We have reason to believe you're co-rabbiting whilst in receipt of benefit."

"We do have good health coverage, but then we never get od and we never get sick."

"Will I be covered by the same medical benefits plan?"

'We considered offering health insurance, but it's cheaper to have taxpayers pick up the tab at hospital emergency rooms.'

"It's no use making all that fuss - there's no such thing as attention seekers allowance."

"Regarding salary and benefits, pick one or the other."

'I called your office and I told them you were sick...They don't know who you are.'

"Don't worry, I'll be very discreet with your personal medical information."

Doctor Nelson is expensive.

"Stock of our medical supplies have flatlined, much like the patients who used them."

'Sure, I could do better, but you try finding a job with medical and dental in this economy.'