Medical Attendant Mugs

'I just come here to brag about my good health.'

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

"Would you like some wings?"

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

Fight or Flight

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

Newlyweds. . . 10 Years Married. . . 25 Years Married. . . 50+ Years Married.

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

Child on an airplane wearing a shirt with a switch that says "Airplane mode"

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

The World's Easiest Airport

The World Wide Web.

'Stop pulling that silly face, Dear.'

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

Employee of the Month Parking

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

A private jet takes off

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

'Flight simulator'

"Sorry for the wait. Have you guys been here long?"

'I feel like my ears are about to pop.'

Vaccination Passport

"I've heard this airline's got some unusual inflight entertainment."

'I dont know about you, but I've got the feeling we're in for long flight delays...'

"I hear they serve Australian swamp rat in first."

'Nobody minds if I take the ocean view suite with complimentary champagne and Sven, the in-room Swedish masseur, do they?'

"You're never home."

"I always send a layover selfie back home, to let everyone know I'm safe."

"Folks, if you look out of your window at those clouds below, you'll have a nice view of the Grateful Dead dancing bears."