Media Specialist Prints

"As a voter, I don't follow any party line, I follow a cable channel."

'With these video-phones, there's just too much documentation on all my promises.'

'Wait a sec...do you want that comment off the record or out of context?'

'We don't believe a word of this c.v... And we'd like to offer you a job.'

'We can call it a library, a media center or a resource room, but we are not going to call it an internet cafe.'

'I used to be a guru but I needed a real job so now I'm a WEBMASTER!'

TV-Heads: You can say that agin. And Again.

"I'll check your circulation."

PR Agency Boots out Prince Charles.

"Shhhh!"

The Truth

"You want to check out a book?"

Freedom of the Press

"And that was the news. . . But please feel free to go online and vent your spite, spread your conspiracy theories and promote your ill-informed opinions. . ."

Russian Propaganda

Independent Press

'Hal, it seems you have a multimedia personality and you're just going to have to get use to that.'

'How fast can you hype?'

'For the next sixty seconds, this station will totally freak out....'

"Well, Sara Kalen is wrong – Edward Snowden is not a 'tattletale.'"

Federal Departument of Edutainment.

This week in tentacles

Trial by Media

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Squeezing the Free Press.

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

"National security adviser"

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"Damn - another letter to the editor."