Media Manager Prints

Desk plaque reads: Plunder globally, media-manage locally.

'Don't worry, I'm not going to jump. I'm just screwing with the media.'

King Solomon's Pollster.

"Nowadays we call it 'media management.' Not a 'payoff'."

"You just finish the drop-off, I'll handle the press."

This red button is for EMERGENCIES...if anything terrible happens to a patient then press it and you'll have a media management team here in minutes.''

'I've put a fresh bowl of questions on your desk.'

"We need more press coverage, please sort out."

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

Trial by Media

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Lynching on social media

"Welcome to the future"

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'

"If this goes badly I'm going to post it on my youtube job interview bloopers channel."

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

CEO with SEO

"I got 30 likes but Mom's was not one of them."

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"

'Being the boss's yes-man used to be easier. Now you also have to 'like' him on facebook, follow him on Twitter, link with him on linked-in...'

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

"You know, there are other emojis."

A boy is sat at a desk, with five plaques implying different qualifications he has earned from using social media.

Press Freedom

Superheroes take a selfie

Gay Times...