Matrimony Pillows

The Sleeping Congregation.

You're my Mona Lisa.

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

Demure lady with gloves

Lesbian civil partnership.

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

When Ted and Nancy would dance, it was as if they were the only couple on the floor....

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

'Oh my God. I love it!'

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

"You may now kiss the bride..."

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

A heart shaped cake

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"You're the lid to my pot."

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

"I feel we haven't moved beyond parallel play."

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."