Math Punster T-Shirts

Math Jokes

Time and money on a seesaw are equals.

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Ugh! They always spell my name wrong?"

"Tell me why you think people are out to get you."

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

The Contrarian funds

"You sure you don't want any Pi?"

"Sometimes I bark at nothing."

"We're a pharmaceutical company. We should be getting 'pharm' subsidies."

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

Gas station

'I had a very unhappy egghood....'

'I don't know if you're a mathematician but my wife's not happy with her Poisson distribution.'

"I'm not that kind of pro-Bono lawyer."

"The real question is do you really need a cracker?"

"Can you give me some sort of metaphor for how you're feeling?"

...Isolated clumps of strange matter pop briefly out of the quantum foam to debate the possible existence of particle physicists.

People who understand Venn diagrams

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

'There's been no confirmation, but the possible merger of two giants has sent stock prices soaring.'

"Hmmmm. I'll bluff. Then they'll counter-bluff, so if I counter-counter-bluff...password should do it."

"How long have you been suffering from anthropomorphism?"

"Oh, nothing much. Just experimenting with some rabbits."

Maths Department with sum on door sign.