Magic-minded Lawyer Pillows

"If you want to win this case, you're going to need a magician."

"Sklar, Liebowitz, Rubin and Kaminsky... Attorneys a go-go."

Jury Selection Today. Have any of you been friended by the defendant on Facebook?

"Let's take in a trial."

Clive Anderson

Restrictive Abortion Laws

'Hello. Law offices of Anderson, Avery, Baer, Barton, Baston, Caggly, Cooper ... drat, who comes after Cooper?'

Law Offices

'I'm a doctor... This man needs someone who can grant me immunity from liability, and fast.'

Transcendental Litigation

"I try to mix art cases with technical cases and have each side of my brain log billable hours."

"So, do we change ends after a fifteen-minute recess?"

"Raise your right hand and swear on the tablet..."

"We're running late. Skip the brief, just give me the tweet."

"I think I can get you off with a lighter sentence, but it might screw up your movie deal."

'He's just been named a super lawyer by the Bar Association.'

Crucial testimony in the case of Cinderella vs. the Association of Fairy Godmothers.

"Innocent, your honor."

"When I'm with you, Miss Lawson, the billable hours just fly by."

'No, insanely funny is not a plea!'

'Then it's agreed. You give sun, water and carbon dioxide and in return, you get oxygen.'

'The Not so Great Escape.'

Barristers playing children's games during the long vacation

Computer Aided Divorce.

"So... that's how lawyers get away with it."

"I'm your Fairy God lawyer and will grant you three Gloria Allreds."

"What this law firm needs is an app that can tweak the law in our favor."

'Do you have a plan B if you can't find work as a frivolous suit litigator?'

"The best thing we've ever done is to buy advertising on vehicle air bags."

'Your wife got the house and the puppies.. but I managed to get you all the buried bones.'

'Objection, deliberately misleading the witness.'

'You have the write to remain silent...'

Court. Wanting to be "the best me I can be" is no excuse for identity theft!

'Things have changed. Instead of throwing the book at my client, the judge threw a CD-ROM disk!'