Local Authority Member Gifts

'Excellent! So that's all agreed, then! All we need do now is draft the consultation document.'

"Who's got the hammer?"

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

Quality Control

"Of course it's a stupid sign, but you wouldn't believe how much money it brings in for city hall!"

'I'm afraid the cuts are beginning to bite!'

'Every year local authorities whinge on about needing more money to maintain services.'

"We've been campaigning for years to encourage central government to delegate more powers to local authorities..."

"It's come to my attention that our sister city has been borrowing our city's clothes without even asking."

'One day son, all this will be collected.'

"Rudy, did you realize it's illegal for a boss to tell his minion how to vote?...And that therefore, I would never tell you to vote for my friend Patsy Marionette, for city council?"

The Mayor Alonzo Q. Furdweiller Pothole. Looks like the mayor and the city council are bickering again.

"They're spelt differently!"

'He's put in a tender to run down public services.'

This is not what I had in mind when I joined the Council!

Man at council planning offices can't get through door due to position of steps.

'Someone come and mediate our argument about mediation!'

'So, you're a little Hitler? You're hired.'

Corruption Contest

Boss, what would you say if I told you that if you don't give me a raise, I'll go work somewhere else? I'd say "Wouldn't it be a shame if your letter of recommendation mentioned how you're an awful employee?" And I'd say "Isn't it a shame the town council has made sure this is the only cafe within fifty miles?" But the way, have you delivered my latest care packages to the council members? Very bad man.

Power corrupts: McDonalds.

Budget cuts were beginning to bite at the local council

Self Serve Road Repair.

Roller skater see a sign: Nightmareville Pop. 5679 Beware Of Government Red Tape

We're from the City Zoning Commission, sir -- we've decided to tear down your house and put up a slum.

'Our drug cartel would like to help Lambeth Council fight the cuts, respecting criteria of inclusion and diversity.'

Gentrification vs Manchester...

'I really think you should check your pools, sir.'

"I suppose you’re wondering why I summoned you, minion." "Not really, boss." "I’ve noticed a disturbing trend: bikinis are getting smaller and smaller, so small, in fact, that they no longer hide anything." "I think it’s about time our cafe took a stand and did something to outlaw this moral decay." "That’s why I’ve arranged for you to hand ‘campaign donations’ to several city councilmembers." "This doesn’t have anything to do with our declining donut sales, does it?" "People should never have t

The Goodman Dynasty

"Paved in gold? Oh my, no. With out crumbling infrastructure we're doing well if the streets are paved at all."

Conflicted Chief

"Your heart won't tolerate any more town-hall meetings."

'Wait a minute! Aren't you the chap who refused planning permission on the St., Mary's church extension?'

'Just take a smidgeon off.'