Literary Liaisons Gifts

'I understand that the two of you had a rather successful collaboration on our new sex manual!'

Frontispiece to the first volume of 'Master Humphrey's Clock'

Audio Books

Isabel Allende

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

"Yes, could you discuss the inspiration for the protagonist? Specifically, the motivations which propel the direction of his narrative?" "I would prefer not to." "Bartleby, the author."

"I know it’s a challenge, but it needs your input!" "...Your breadth of knowledge of different interest groups, religions...cultures!" "Right, so the staff Christmas meal will be a traditional lacto-vegan one at a Thai restaurant sometime in March?" "Do you think the Pagans will be OK with that?"

"Call me, Ishmael."

'And I say he makes us look bad when he rides around listening to those books.'

'If you've brought us gifts we don't want any more Des O'Connor records!'

Library: The Weight lifting Section.

Miss Jellyby

"Is there a dramaturge in the house?"

Tiny Tim, who did not die, grows up to marry Little Nell, who did not die, either.

'You're an interesting combination of shallow and thick.'

'Books that stayed books.'

'So...your shelf or mine?...' (a book in a bar trying a pickup line)

Anthropomorphic Fiction.

Anais Nin.

"I was quite a successful writer once...what sort of books are you interested in?"

Where's the last chapter? It's not finished yet. It's where the writer sleeps with the publisher after he agrees to publish her novel.

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

Mrs Gummidge casts a damp on our Departure

'Well, Watson, it appears as if my hunch was correct...'

'Book shop. Just browsing thanks.'

"We may have the same books, but we highlight entirely different passages."

"Let's make romance non-fiction."

Portrait of the Artist as a Young Invisible Man for All Seasons

Walt Disney's The Little Handmaid

"It happened at a book burning. It was one of those books I couldn't put down."

Together...

Moby Poppins

"No, trashy paperbacks is the next but one..."