
"Yes, you were found guilty of the same crime in 2004."
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"Yes, you were found guilty of the same crime in 2004."
'I guess we should have expected blue laws up here.'
The Signing of tthe United States Constitution
"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."
'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'
"I understand the revisionists are hot on your trail, Professor Delauney."
"The bear whose porridge was too hot...did he sue?"
'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'
Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!
'The pioneers opened the frontier, but it wasn't legal until brave lawyers blazed the paper trail!'
Stop and Birch
'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''
"#notguilty."
"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"
Lawyer to bad hair lady: 'It's difficult to establish pain and suffering based on a bad hair day.'
Intellectual Property
"Stop billing your daughter for reading her bedtime stories!!"
"Another slander suit!"
How a Bill Becomes a Law, 2023
"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."
'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'
'Just think of one of these as enabling legislation for the golden rule.'
Arrogant junior barrister
'My client has required the services of countless law enforcement, court, penal and probation personnel. He's not a menace...he's a jobs creator!'
"'Ignorance of the law is no excuse.' Golly! I never heard that one! Did you ever hear that one?"
"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."
"It's either this or a country run by lawyers."
So you'd like to be a lawyer...we require honest, genuine people, who are prepared to...learn how to fake sincerity.
'I'm here waiting appeals.'
"When I grow up I'm going to be a police officer and follow in my dad's footsteps."
"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."
Upholding the Law
Clarence Thomas
Obama slipping on legal details related to Guant?namo Bay
Policing the Police
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