
"The way I see it, justice delayed is that many more billable hours."
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"The way I see it, justice delayed is that many more billable hours."
"Innocent, Your Honor."
Pick A Lawyer
'Maybe my dad can't whip your dad, but he's very litigious!'
'Your Honor, my client would like to plead, 'That was then, and this is now.''
"I have listened very carefully to all the evidence."
"Right, we need three units of lawyer blood. Make sure it's really cold."
"Had no idea that was illegal."
"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."
"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."
"Good boy."
"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."
"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."
Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'
US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.
Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.
"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."
'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'
"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."
Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth
Neo-International Law
"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"
"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."
"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"
'No, it's not really good - that's our lawsuits-to-earnings ratio.'
"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."
"Read our contracts, Ms Donahue. It says 'No Sexual Harassment on the workfloor!'"
'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'
'If corporate lawyers are a dime a dozen, where are the other ten?'
'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'
No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal
Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.
'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'
'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'
'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'
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