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40 minutes in this position

"It wasn't supposed to be funny."

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

'The Great Depression? Didn't they have Prozac then?'

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

"Albert the Great—what a joke."

'This prescription will stimulate your funny bone which will cause you to laugh. We both know that laughter is the best medicine.'

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

"Your therapy will be a combination of drugs and clowns."

'Pencil on couch being psycho analysed.'

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."

'We're like one big family tree... that's why everyone is in therapy.'

Bernice Mountain Dog

Psychiatrist: Mind over matter filing trays.

"Why do you feel like you're lost?"

'Life's little wonders are too big for me.'

"No heroic measures."

'I may not really need you. My imaginary friend is a psychiatrist.'

'You are crazy, but in a NICE way.'

'Animal Psychiatrist' (a dog).

"You dawdle, daydream. You make lists of things to do but can't get started. You seem to be restricted from doing what you know you should be doing. These problems will dissolve when you read Chapter Ten of my new book, at eight dollars and ninety-five cents."

"Since you ask, when I'm through here I go home and listen to a bunch of mindless crap on TV."

"This obsession of yours about becoming a car mechanic..."

Laughter Therapy.

Cut out and keep your own Freud.

'Yes, we are going in circles. How do you feel about that?'

'It's not my childhood that traumatised me. It's the size of your bills.'

'It's good to talk.'

'I'm becoming predictable.'

"I guess I'll never understand women."

Mathematician on the couch.

'You say it only hurts when you laugh? Don't worry, I've brought in a specialist.'