Language Student T-Shirts

English As A Second Language

A Puppet Named Juan

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

Where your mind & battle are los

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

Computer Room.

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

'C'mon get it straight.'

'When I grow up, I want to be a hydraulic engineer...'

Big Bang Theory.

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

Campaign for Plain English

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

I will study my speling words...

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

Eternal Student.

Torturing the English Language

Thru versus Through Traffic

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish