Key Detective T-Shirts

A Lesson in Leadership: Misplacing your keys isn't a problem, unless you have to enlist the whole school's support to find them.

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

"Of course it's a stupid sign, but you wouldn't believe how much money it brings in for city hall!"

We have a problem with your research. We're Encyclopedia Britannica and you're Wikipedia.

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

'I can't believe an Alligator stole my identity... I mean, it's quite obvious I'm a Crocodile!'

"The camera is mounted on your desk for a reason. There's been some paperclips missing, and we think you're the culprit."

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

Micro and Macro Department,

Don't forget to read the small print.

"Your curriculum vitae is extremely detailed, isn't it? I don't quite know what to make of the fact that your third-grade teacher, Miss Hartley, made you stand in the corner for throwing an eraser although another kid did it."

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

'We don't have anyone here by that name. Was he perhaps using one of his aliases?'

"You say in your resume that you're very meticulous."

'Harlow, do you wnat to be part of the problem or part of the coverup?'

"I just audited our books. Your register came up five cents short, Rudy."

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

Devil in the detail

"Find out who put a 100 dollar bill in the suggestion box. This person has potential!"

Mouse with map exiting maze.

"And, should you ever lose the key to the city, I hid another one here."

'Talk about paranoid. He reads the fine print on his money.'

When pedants take a break.

"We need to talk about procrastination."

'Well, I don't know anything about 'identity theft'. All I can tell you, is that according to these records you're already here.'

Forward Planning - The key to Success

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

"Today the CIA investigated the FBI's investigation of the IRS' investigation of Trump."

'Your wife called while you were out, sir -- she loves you and wants to know where the hell you put the car keys.'

The Sleep of Reason Produces Bureaucracy

"This is probably how they keep getting in."

'There's only one piece left. C'mon, we can figure this out.'

"Don't let the organized desk fool you. I have no idea where my computer files are."

"The little one? That's for small print!"