Judge Of Flavors Gifts

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

'Needs salt!'

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

Coffee Menu

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

"And how is the 'medium' salmon you had me overcook?!"

"We call it 'dish' of the day, but it's actually served on a plank of wood."

A shop is called 'Garnishes: Top Meals in Tough Times'.

Chef

'He's judging our reserve pinot noir - five years to produce it, five seconds in his mouth.'

Produce Academy. The lemons were all sent to detention again today? Yeah, they're always tarty.

Last Will and Testament: Salt, Pepper, Tarragon, Garlic.

Pig Cheese

"I've come to judge some books by their cover."

'We let 65 people try the '03 Malbec and told them they couldn't just describe it as 'good'. The result: 65 said it was 'very good'.'

"My attorney feels it's unwise for me to continue to represent you."

"What? No Vanilla?"

"Hey, Johnny—am I nuts, or does this have a hint of oak?"

'The merlot is 100 merlot; the pinot noir is 100 pinot noir, and the chardonnay is 100 Swiss chard.'

Seasoning Greetings!

What can I get you? Something light but filling. Flavorful but not too spicy. Healthy but not boring. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Something right in the middle. Neither here nor there. It must walk the line of non-offensive yet opinionated. I wonder if Arby's is taking applications. If I eat a sandwich in the woods and no one is around, do I make a sound?

Pick 'n' Mix Potato Crisps

"Guilty! The broth was awful!"

'This tastes like dishwater.'

"We start with black coffee and then add a lot of stuff so it doesn't taste like black coffee."

"On advice of counsel...do not order the prime rib well done."

Homemade Jam.

"The doctor says I should go on a bland diet. There's no bland in this house!"

"Compliments? Well, someone said the salt and pepper tastes nice."