
Piers Morgan vs Anderson Cooper
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Piers Morgan vs Anderson Cooper
Occu-Pie Mars
"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."
'How fast can you hype?'
They're Not Just That Into It
Vote Centrist to Keep Things Exactly as Awful as They Are
The Circular Logic of Fascism
"Are all Brits bisexual, or just the ones who publish their diaries?"
'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'
Coronavirus Waves
"I'm Lester Holt, and this, is date night."
This Is What Moral Corruption Looks Like
Learn to Be a Critic In The Privacy Of Your Own Home With The Apex Correspondence School Of Criticism!
We have a problem with your research. We're Encyclopedia Britannica and you're Wikipedia.
News for Sale
"Okay, quote me. I'm on the record."
"We live in interesting times. Present company exempted, of course."
'Are we watching business news or sports news?'
'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'
A penguin's life is like endless summer camp, swimming and fishing all day every day!
"But what's my motivation?"
Print Suicide
Charlie Beck Loves Austin Beutner
'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'
Someday
"We interrupt this special bulletin about Ferguson and Tulsa, to bring you a special bulletin about Baltimore..."
DOGE* to English Instant Translator Device
Eye Off the Ball
Giving Up a Little Privacy
Doves of peace trapped within the statue of liberty.
"Oh, say you can't see, any conflicts of interest in me! What's good for my brand, is now the law of the land! And the crooked media's nasty glare, my killer tweets bursting in air... Gave proof to the news cycle, that I'm so awesome it's almost unfair!..
"It says here an increasing number of Brits blog and tweet in Afrikaans. Why?"
"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness." It's okay for a first draft, Thomas, but it'll be much better if you make it rhyme!
Blameless
Weapens of Mass Instruction
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