Job Changes T-Shirts

'I can remember when you only had to worry about delivering good sermons.'

'We're reducing office space, Trubshaw. You're under 'T' below.'

'There were seven of us - but we lost grumpy, Snoozy, Bashful and Doc in the restructuring.'

"The company is in deep water? Why do you think so?"

'The real downside of all these layoffs is that I don't have anybody left to scream at.'

"It looks like I survived the downsizing."

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

Where your mind & battle are los

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

'Let's not go by the book.'

Butterfly Woman

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

In basket-case.

'How fast can you hype?'

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

'The lads at the office still talk about the day you told the boss what to do with his job...'

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

Doug had trouble getting home at a decent hour.

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

Outer Space Outsourcing

"I don't care if you are the Immediate Gratification Generation. Get out of my chair and back to the mailroom."

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."