Investing In Property Mugs

"This is the grand ballroom. I think it has a lot of potential."

'He predicts home prices will go up this year? Yeah, and if I go outside every morning and predict rain, eventually I'll be right, too.'

The tax and maintenance charges are why they call them con-doughs.

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Beautiful lake front property/Disgusting lake rear property

Investment Opportunity Agent.

'That house is a fixer upper. Are you handy with a checkbook?'

Home Sweet Second Home.

Mortgage up: 'Where?.'

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

"I've invested in property..."

'Son, someday this will all be yours. Or Wal-Mart's. Whoever pays Daddy the most.'

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

'I think this is deep enough for the foundations!'

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

"The floors are hot lava, but the apartment does come furnished with plenty of pillows."

"Hello, and welcome to 'Homes Under the Hammer. . .'"

"Sold his air rights."

'It's only four acres but we're glad we bought it - he's always wanted to be an expert in his own field.'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

'Your mortgage is under water...so what's the problem?'

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'It will cost more, but I suggest building from scratch instead of a gingerbread mix.'

For sale sign: 'Unique 16th Century cottage. Similar properties wanted.'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

Eye, ear, nose, throat & real estate investment trusts.

The Speculators

The End of the Property Boom is Nigh.