Internet Survivor Mugs

Internot - No broadband in your area.

Abandon all hope of Wifi ye who enter here

"Here lies...died on-line."

"My email is down... talk to me."

Online form - Submit.

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

Spammatic blaster - gun to shoot pop-up ads.

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

Modern Calamities. Farmer in the Dell. Do something Maw

'I have the MRI scan of your brain. The right hemisphere is clogged with computer passwords.'

"Just got back from the client meeting and great news. . . your work isn't dead. It's beaten senseless and run over by a dump truck...but still very much alive."

Too many people post comments in the heat of anger. They strike while the ire is hot!

"We understand you're not happy with our privacy policy."

Error: Out of memory.

"Our computers will be down for an hour, so I advise everyone to hide under their desks. The last time it was total anarchy until we were back online."

"Thanks for the offer... but I'd rather see if tech support can get my computer running."

'Technology hasn't saved me any money. I'm now supporting those relatives of mine they replaced.'

"We don't need a digital security guard. Hackers don't actually come to our house."

Come to bed, Snookums. In a minute. Are you still playing Scrabble? And flaming my opponents. I just crushed an eight-year-old by 100 points and then told him his parents don't love him because he's illiterate! How nice you've found a hobby. I feel so nurtured.

"I said, can you hear me now...?!"

'I'm pleased to announce the newly-created 'Office of Homepage Security' - to protect against computer hackers.'

"It just doesn't seem right. Ever since the new system upgrade nothing is where it used to be!"

"Whatever the politicians might decide, I'm well prepared because I've got enough hate comments for the next five years!"

Dot com profits chart going down into the dustbin.

That night, Andy attempted to start a Twitter revolution.

'Smog, pollen, acid-rain, holes in the ozone-layer, crime, road rage, terrorists - HERE I COME!'

"Ms Hathaway, I need to test my mettle. Find someone on social media who thinks they can bully me."

SOPA supporters regroup.

Meta data retention.

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

"Is this the queue for Funworld?"