Interactive Help Seeker Pillows

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

Self help acupuncture

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

"Mom, please shake my chair. I'm taking a virtual school bus ride before class begins."

"I can motivate everyone except myself."

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

Bookstore, the Politically Incorrect Guide to You.

One man's obstacle is another man's stepping stone.

'When my business turned into a lemon, I made lemonade....but that also failed when nobody liked its taste'

"I like this Carl, you've come up with more solutions than we have problems."

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

"Now that I've solved all my problems, I think I'm ready to create more"

'Trouble is they always forget to return them...'

"Tell me more about your fear of going bald."

DNA Analysis.

"I think I can". (train)

Thinking with the left side of the brain/Thinking with what's left of your brain.

Japanese woman in minimalist house reads 'How to Clutter Your Life'

Quiz Night...

"Have you tried just giving your head a shake?"

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

Monster Self-Help

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

'Think tank' and 'Rethink tank'.

"The problem with your reasoned solutions is they don't fit my preconceived notions of the problems."

'What makes you think no-one understands you?'

Global Positioning Manual

"So, how long have you struggled with impostor syndrome?"

So You Finally Caught Your Tail

"Yes, it's sort of a yearning disability."

I'm ridiculously small. My nose is huge. I have ears like a jackass... Manic depressive with low elf esteem.

"...and what do you think will happen if you do attend the party?

New must reading for the rising executive: '7 Habits of Highly Obsequious People.'