Independent Filmmaker Mugs

"Tiffany tells me you were at Sundance."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

Crocodile

Kirsten Johnson

Movie Awards. That movie always comes alone and never stays for the after-party. It's an independent film.

Police film evidence

A 1920's film director with hand-cranked camera and megaphone.

"Mom! Kathy's feeding her liver to the dog! Want to see the video?"

"Ronny, there's not going to be any 3-D. The studio wants you to shoot it on your cell phone."

"Ugh! Stop making a drama documentary out of a molehill."

My friend, Ernie, the documentary filmmaker, is producing a series about beverages. One film follows a man's search for the perfect lager. The working title is "The Beer Hunter." He found a group of young women in high school who are fantastic baristas. "Bean Girls." Espresso. Another movie will uncover animosity in the orange juice business. Maybe I should call it "Pulp Friction." And he's examining vineyards and winemakers all over the globe. I'll call the film "Planet of the Grapes"!

'I'll be the back yard cutting firewood. Have you seen my protective goggles?. . .Well, luckily I kept my old hockey mask!'

Pub. This is John. He also loves obscure bands until they're popular then hates them. The Druidiots. Luckies. 50 ale.

"What I did on my summer vacation and how I optioned it to Miramax..."

Self-employed.

'I still say these shots need more action.'

"My report on summer vacation. . . Book and movie rights are available for $1000 each."

'Coming up next...more of man's inhumanity to man...in hi-def.'

'If whales are so intelligent, why do they swim near Japan?'

Ernie is a documentary filmmaker who tells stories of folks in their professional lives -- I think he should wonk on his film titles more. One film looked at the surprisingly competitive cutthroat world of the dry cleaning business. "The Hanger Games." In another, we see astronomers traveling to remote locations to escape light pollution. "The Dark Night." Ernie showed us the bond among young butchers in an increasingly vegan world. "Stand by Meat"! And he told us the story of a man who i

Duplass Brothers

"Those pervs from the nature channel are filming us again."

'Great! So that's the film... Now for the sound!'

'Hold it - someone's filming this without permission!'

John Waters

Michael Moore

"You're going out there an annoying, mannered girl, but you're going to come back an indie queen."

"They say she's gone completely Sundance."

'Because it's there.' ... 'Because he may fall.'

The Hidden World of Desks

I'm making the definitive sledding video.

Rain Forest Filmcrew

'You're a funny beggar, switching off the sound just because Joanna Lumley is ENTHUSING!'