Humorist In Robe Mugs

I don't like it when lawyers put coffee on my desk. Relax, judge. It's tequila.

Golfing Boss

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

"Yo, Ned Beatty, paddle harder if you ever want to kiss me again."

'If we were in the Renaissance, we'd be painting nativity scenes right now.'

'Will you marry me, Gloria?'

"In this company the managers and workers see eye to eye...you just have to ask the caretaker for a ladder."

"Trust me, detainee orange is going to be huge this fall."

"Helen, is it possible that we are using our child as an intimacy barrier?"

"Put on a tie. We've been invited to the castle."

"While you were on vacation, Zooker, a motion was made and seconded to saw five and a half inches off your chair legs."

'Yes, my opinion today is the opposite of what I said yesterday. In my position, this is called 'flexibility', in your position, it would be called 'unreability''.

Dating Rule #1. Repeat after me: I need some space. I need some space. Got it. Good. Make sure you tell that to Laurel all the time. But

'You'll marry me? Really? Then forget it! I can't be with someone who's standards are that low!'

Two piece outfits only.

'That's not true, I do listen. I'm just not very interested.'

"My records show we sent your bonus. Have you looked on your roof?"

"This cabernet sauvignon will have you feeling more like yourself in no time."

"You do realize you're violating the dress code..."

'Wait a minute -- Shouldn't you be saying something about 'If not completely satisfied'?'

'If that's true, if you've really done it, I can say unequivocally, that is indeed...Nothing to sneeze at!'

'He's in a meeting. Would you like to speak to his assistant?'

'Could this mean that we're finally profitable?'

'When the aliens abducted and probed me, they said I was fine. But I'd like a second opinion.'

'No kidding? You're the bluebird of mutually assured destruction deterrants?'

A Female and Male Banana going for a Skinny-dip into the ocean.

"Gangs Of Nude Beach"

'We operate on the point system here. When you see something go wrong, point at whoever you think is to blame.'

'I'm gonna go slip into something less comfortable.'

"I was thinking more of a leap-year wedding."

"He says he's dressing up for summer."

Barrister laughing at the judge's jokes

'I'm an artistic genius, I bet no-one has ever painted a plain old bowl of fruit.'