Hospitaliversary T-Shirts

'I've waited so long that my body went into over-drive and healed itself!'

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

Shepherd and eurydice

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

Where your mind & battle are los

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Tartine

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

Playing Fetch.

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

Butterfly Woman

'Let's not go by the book.'

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'