Hospital Sitcom Fan Prints

'I thought my appointment was for a TB screening.'

'No, your wife wasn't wearing clean underwear. She wasn't wearing any underwear at all.'

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

'Reflexes seem normal. You kept him waiting over two hours.'

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

'I'd like a second opinion, doctor.'

"Your test results are in...now the interpretations can begin."

"Please, doc, pull the plug. Not on me...on the TV!"

"Since he was born today he won't begin daycare until tomorrow."

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

"We think we got some good CT scans, but unfortunately they're encrypted and our I.T. guy is on vacation this week."

"BBC One’s Casualty has reached its 1000th episode. The long-running hospital drama is apparently very popular with viewers... But even more popular among jobbing actors."

"I told you, Doctor! There's nothing in here!"

'And then, just to humor the guy I said 'I need a hug', little thinking that the big gorilla would do just that.'

'It's your four basic food groups.'

Footballer with a broken leg and a ball in his cast.

'Is that guy back again? Hey, if you find that sponge I lost, give a shout.'

"I came here to be treated - not flattered!"

Doctor has the taste for patients urine samples.

'If it don't hurt, don't mess with it!'

'Urology...can you hold?'

"Whoops..."

'I'll give it back to you in a second hon, I just want to get this broccoli out of my teeth.'

'Where does it hurt?'

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

'I'm afraid we've removed your wooden leg by mistake.'

'I thought I told you to cut down on sugar.'

"All of my visitors have to wear that get up. Apparently my humour is very infectious."

'You're excused. Anyone else feel too squeamish to witness the procedure?'

Too much Inflammation

'Apart from the pain I can't get my hat off.'

'On second thought, you can go home anytime you want, big fella.'

"I have some troubling news, Mr. Smithson. You're in my parking space."