Hook And Line Humorist Pillows

'I'll never let my love of fishing come between us.'

Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen. Summer's almost over

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"A whack, whack here. A whack, whack there. Here a whack, there a whack. Everywhere a whack, whack."

"The Eggsorcist"

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

The Forbidden Joyce Kilmer

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"...You talking to me? Well, I'm the only one here... You talking to me?!" "Narcissus De Niro"

'Ms Simpson, I believe I've finally done it. I've written the Great American Memo.'

Local rock claims to have been muse for Emily Dickinson poem "I'm that 'little stone' honest to goodness!"

"William Blake said you can see the whole world in a grain of sand, but he doesn't always make a lot of sense."

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

Meet the author - celebrity autobiographies,

"He's very disciplined about his writing, every morning he stares at the keyboard for at least 4 hours before he allows himself a cup of tea!"

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Kultural K9's.

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

'Neither a lender nor a borrower be.'

"I see you also took the road less travelled!"

Tolstoy and Dostoevsky plan a collaboration - 'War and Punishment'... it'll make us a bundle.

T.S. Eliot lacks the courage to eat a peach.

"Pendleton, as of noon today your services will no longer be required. Meanwhile, keep up the good work."

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

Hamlet in the craft shop.

Encyclopedic Novel Slam.

"I write mostly confessional non-fiction."

"I'm thinking of leaving these crowded condos and going to a place that's been deserted for years...the mall."