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"Mulch madness"

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

Jack of all trades

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

'I found the termites!'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

I did it my way.

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

"I said to myself, 'Maybe I can't change the world, but I can remodel my bathroom.' "

A DIY disaster.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

Do-It-Yourself. Do-it-yourself-With-Good-Friends-and-Pizza-and-A-Few-Beers.

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

"Next time don't use a herbed vinegar."

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

"Have you been using 'Vanish' again?"

We're putting on a subtraction.

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

"Want to impress me with that hammer? Try using it to fix a few things around here."

"The white flag means he gives up and will finally hire a professional to finish the renovation."

Your Home Remodel Team

'I'm so excited to be remodeling the bathroom'

'She seems to think I only have one thing on my mind.'

'I found out how to redecorate the easy way - just call the old wallpaper names and it will come down to slap you!'