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"Don't worry - the dog's out at the moment."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

Desert Island Mishap

'You know our track team stinks when our star pole vaulter is better at the limbo.'

"There goes our early night."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

'Well for crying out loud, why didn't you do that when I asked you?!!'

It's all gravy.

A cock up of builders

"Shall I kiss it better?"

"May I suggest hard a-starboard, or port, or whatever!"

Only Percy seemed happy that the Titanic was taking on water.

Japan Disaster: Japanese fighting Nuclear Grim Reaper.

'That Noah's some sailor, the World is covered in water and he runs aground!'

"Of course it tastes like chicken. That's why it's called the 'tuna surprise'."

"Someone woke up on the wrong side of the earth."

Some just ain't cut out for wind farmin'.

"Sometimes it sucks to be the Captain."

A shark swims into a desert island.

Leaking washing machine.

Flooding

'How was the snapper, sir?'

"Iron Chef, my ass!"

I'm glad I'm not outside on a day like this.

'It finally happened. We have so many dishes in the sink with unidentifiable crud stuck to them that they spontaneously combusted.'

It's Who We Are.

'Before I bring it in,darling-don't forget you married JANIE Oliver and not Jamie!'

"This is like the sinking if some really, really, really big ship."

Typical Taurus.

'Keep going...the future of trite metaphors depends on us.'

The tip of the iceberg