Genetic Experiments Buff Mugs

Conspiracy Ants

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

At the Museum

Apples for sale

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

'Some of those youngsters have come up with a terrific new idea - feathers.'

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

God Sneezes Out Creation

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

"Walk, hell- I gotta dance."

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

'I don't see why I have to pick it up. I'm not responsible for the law of gravity.'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

Archimedes, Galileo, Copernicus

A day at the transgenic races

All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.

You must be this tall.

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

"What's a nine-letter word for biotechnology?"

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

"That concludes my presentation on popular music and alternative energy."

Corona Funeral

"Well, Comstock, still regret putting our profits back into research?"

Genius Envy

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

'I like scientists: They are genuinely interested in every mundane thing we do and keep detailed records...'