Gastronomic Grumbler T-Shirts

"We saw some inspired lunacy, then had some uninspired Italian."

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

The Cat's Alarm Clock

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'I would kill for a truffle.'

Dog orders the food 9 out of 10 dogs prefer.

Rodin's Irish Judge

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

Heathrow Protesters - This airport's rubbish!

The Master chef had produced his masterpiece... a monster Danish pastry!

"My computer still won't work. It must still hold a grudge from when I punched it in frustration."

"OK, now here comes the lava."

Le Bolshie Chef.

'Why does the phone always have to ring when I'm out of the bath?!'

Man - 'This coffee tastes like mud!' Woman - 'It was ground this morning.'

'Mum! Mum!... My egg's gone all runny!'

'To be perfectly honest, I hate my job: I'm not really a morning person...'

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'

'No, I'm still standing in this stupid line looking at the back of somebody's stupid head.'

"The sooner they take you off vice patrols the better."

"Perfect weather,wounderful food...and it all distracted me from spending the whole day at my computer terminal!"

"Best served at street temperature, delicious served with dustbin chipsor gutter squashed, half eaten kebab..."

'Irritable bowl syndrome'

"Teaching's a joy until the first bell. Then the whole day's ruined."

"Where's the snooze button on this thing?" "Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!"

'We've figured out your problem. You're allergic to grapes.'

"Whoever invented the obituary page is a real jerk."

Chicken running out of restaurant, waiter: "Err, chickens off"

'I hate Mondays!'

"Voila!! For the Lady, Seafood Linguine, and I believe Sir ordered the Chef's Surprise?"

House of Beans.

"Too sunny for you. Too dry. Whatever next?"

"If you are angry at being kept on hold, press 1, if you are furious press 2, if you are apoplectic with rage ..."

Supermarket Self Service Checkout