Garage Work Pillows

'When I ask what our inventory is 'What ever' is not an acceptable answer.'

"I'm having a little difficulty adjusting. The last place I worked was a lot bigger."

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

"Did you say 39 or 93?"

Mechanics price list.

'Before you say it's got some old parts, remember that you repaired it last time.'

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

Tires, Oil Changes, Dumb Bumper Stickers Removed.

Auto Mechanic Birthdays

"Oh...that's not good."

"Give me anything but a screwdriver."

'They don't make cars like this any more -- the country that built them disappeared.'

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

CLEAR!

"Bernard is our sous-mechanic."

Jump-starting Frankenstein's monster

"Wendel found an Israeli tomato stuck in your front water hose."

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

"Forget it – we're not buying some expensive sex robot for it to end up unused in the garage with the massaging armchair and the rowing machine."

"Crap! I forgot to put my car in the garage again!"

When did you last have your oil changed?

"It's worse than I thought."

'I wanted a little more speed. I just hope I'm not violating any laws by using a jet engine.'

'I need a really loud horn. My brakes are a bit spongy.'

'I understand you work on foreign models?'

'I've been riding small, fast bikes for awhile. I thought it was time to build a bigger motorcycle.'

Mad Cyclist Disease, the latest problem to plague cyclists.

'It's almost time to get the cross-country skis out and dust them off.'

Repairing the UFO

'Mac works on cars strictly for his own amusement.'