Future Parent Giggler Prints

"After trying to start a family for so long, our doctor suggested a radical approach. . . sex! On every conceivable occasion.""

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

The Complete Book of Baby Names. Oooh, what do you think of 110101110110? Isn't that cute?

"Mother nature sure is confusing...she gives me a clothes line but no clothes!"

"If I turn it up I might get out of here quicker!"

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

"Mum's biological clock is ticking away...OOPS!...my mistake. That's indigestion."

Baby, baby maker

Baby's First Words... Hi Guys!

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

-THIRTY thousand? I thought you wanted TEN thousand? -I'm having triplets!

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

"Dear Mum. As contractions begin I thank you for letting me share your uterus. When do I get my bond money back??"

'I've had some strange cravings during my pregnancy. Such as the one to strangle my husband.'

"It's perfect for starting a family."

The beautiful but deadly 'Venus dog trap'.

Maternity ward: 'Baby talk spoken here.'

'We need to discuss your ultrasound.'

'First, let's see him program a DVD recorder.'

'I'm never having kids, I hear they take nine months to download.'

"Amazing. For the fifth consecutive month the polling shows I'm the most popular foetus here."

"Did you want to know if the baby's a boy or a girl?"

'And once we transfer the embryo, aspirate the follicles, and align your ovulation with the doctor's gold schedule, voila -- natures little miracle.'

"We can make you more pregnant than you ever though possible."

We decided that a puppy would be good practice before having a baby.

'We should probably think about baby proofing the place a bit.'

Doctors talking about ways to confuse patients with jargon.

"Who says nothing good is made in America anymore?"

The future Mario Andretti about to be conceived

This girl says she wants to have her children young...that doesn't scare me off. Who wants old children?

'I'm sorry Mrs Jones, but according to these results your womb is extremely inhospitable, and your husband's sperm is gay.'

Baby boom expected due to corona