Fusion Flavor Aficionado Pillows

"It's a coffee for when you'd rather be drinking tea."

"OMG, LOL!"

"Beanirrito"

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

Before/After

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"Who had the Sodom Enchilada and the Holy Guacamole?"

American style Greek cafe.

"Lemon 'merengue' pies"

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

Tzatzikicicle

"Was there a photo in the recipe book? I'd love to see what it's meant to look like."

'We're losing the mid-morning market. Let's put a hamburger in a glazed donut and call it brunch.'

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

A shop is called 'Garnishes: Top Meals in Tough Times'.

"What are we doing for Cinco de Mayo this year?"

Jewish man walks into a restaurant called 'Oy Sushi'.

"We call it 'dish' of the day, but it's actually served on a plank of wood."

"Honey, quick – the demi-glace is about to simmer – pass me a shot of Don Julio 1942 tequila!"

Produce Academy. The lemons were all sent to detention again today? Yeah, they're always tarty.

In the Works: Eurocheese, Eurobread, Eurowine.

'So...they got you too.'

'-and I suppose you want chips with it?'

'We're at an Italian restaurant this time, Kevin -- those are breadsticks, not giant-size chopsticks.'

"You want fries with that Chardonnay?"

Mom's Alphabet Soup, Inc. Mom's. With globalization, we don't need to worry about the bits of broken letter anymore --- We can just call them accent marks!

Unsuccessful Christmas novelty items. Blitzen on a Kitten. Angel on a Bagel. Frosty on a coffee. Claus on your Bras.

'We let 65 people try the '03 Malbec and told them they couldn't just describe it as 'good'. The result: 65 said it was 'very good'.'

Five seconds before the first turducken.

"You may be asking for trouble, Ernie."

'Well, it's just like they say, Fred. When all you have is a laser-driven plasma cathode injector, everything looks like an inertial confinement fusion experiment.'

"What? No Vanilla?"

'Really, Derek's fusion cuisine is something to die for.'

'Are you going to say Grace, Sir, or shall I?'