Fountain Management T-Shirts

"I think you'd better switch the water feature off."

Pipe Dream.

A Hole in the Dike

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

Sick Building Syndrome

Caution signs.

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

"We are extremely short-staffed here and you would need to be okay with that. For example I’m the janitor, but I also do interviews in between emptying trash cans."

Job Safety - Hardhat.

'It's your fault. I told you to watch that wet spot.'

How Many It Takes

Modular Offices

"I like fountains very much!"

"I hate all the paperwork there is with this job."

The new electronic system is efficient, but the garage had to sacrifice parking spaces for it.

Water-works.

"And to think NASA hit a target 11 million kilometres away."

"The redesign has made the waiting room a much more tranquil place..."

Access Assessments

Caution wet floors. . . Caution DRY ceilings.

"It's times like this I wish I was ore than just an armchair plumber."

Water Gardening: And you will find yourself thinking over many garden problems at the waterside.

"Well, the drought is over."

'They gave me this new cubicle with my own water fountain, treadmill, lunch dish... hey, wait a minute!'

"This is supposed to be the clean room so we'll give it an additional five minutes."

'To be honest, I'm sorry I ever asked him for a water feature. . .'

Gas Price Reads: Way Too Much.

The Fountain of Youth.

"Who the hell keeps turning up the heat in here!?!"

"We were lucky to find an island with a water feature."

Man gets covered in fountain water as his dog shakes himself dry.

'I really think you should check your pools, sir.'

"Here's the problem, I grabbed the wrong map. This isn't the Fountain of Youth. This is the Fountain of Middle Age."

An occassional clean out should prevent unpleasant smells.