Fortune Hunters Pillows

'You're going to have an accident. Soon.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

'The bad news is you're going to marry a geek, and not a pro athlete. The good news is the geek owns the team.'

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

'This fortune cookie says 'buy oriental tea futures'...'

'You reached the Nervous Investor Fund's Hotline. The per share value is now 19.05, now 18.91, now...'

"....and then it turned out that the e-mail I ignored that I got from the Nigerian bank offering me £200 million was REAL!"

'This New Year you will be bathed in a sea of cash!...Hand on...Sorry. This New Year you will need a flea bath for some sort of rash.'

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

'Can you see the future of my 401(k)?'

'Don't worry about making your will, Miss Moneybags leave everything to me. . .'

"Mine says this relationship will never work out and I should dump you right now!"

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

"I've found that when money starts talking, you can't shut 'er up!"

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

Made all my investment decisions with a coin flip.

'The crystal ball says to buy and the 8-Ball says to sell.'

Man sees 'Palm Readings and Stock Projections' business window

'You see me coming here every week and paying you fifty dollars...'

Golden Eggs.

Gambling on office building construction

"Trepanning for gold"

'After only a few years in the market I had a small fortune - unfortunately I'd started out with a big one.'

'Risky? Good lord no! We're going to make a fortune!'

Oil explodes from the wishing well.

'Your life will being when all of your kids are married and the dog dies.'

Share Prices - "Due to a delay in installing our new computer price system, I can give you an answer immediately."

'The very name 'windfall profits' show it's an act of god.'

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

'I may charge a lot but you get much more through me. I'm a psychic large.'

Your Winning Lottery Numbers Told: 'If they are really what you say - how come you can only afford a tent?'

"Forget about tall and handsome. What about portfolio 10 year highs and lows?"

"I'm a little uneasy about the 'sometimes'."

Fortune teller predicts a bigger family for worried parents.