Former Hiking Enthusiast T-Shirts

"I used to love to hike but now I'm cured."

Fly Fishing

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 9.

"I don't remember it ever being this windy before."

'Echo Tourism'

Scenic Root: ants, bugs and worms using an exposed tree root as a scenic route.

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

"The only problem with living at the top of a mountain is the constant stream of people coming to ask stupid questions."

"Getting dark, Sweetie. Better text Mom you love her."

"When are you gonna roll in something?"

"Yaffle Pass Elevation 11,990 ft Continental Divide"

"Hey guys - wrote a new song! It's called 'I suggested Paris.' And a' one, two three..."

'Bob, wait!!! Nice try, bear.'

Guru. It's not some kind of zen metaphor --- I really do have an invisible fence!

"The meaning of life, eh? Beats me... Let's google it."

'I wouldn't bother. They're probably gluten-free vegetarians.'

Steve found himself on his travels.

"Damn Pope Gregory and his new calendar."

'You're gonna love it son! We'll leave our homes for a few days and live in the great outdoors'

Kelly couldn't recall mating with a condor, but then there was that New Year's Eve party...

I'm a little disappointed -- I always thought the ultimate secret to the universe would rhyme.

"I'm not overpacked... I'm prepared!"

'My pine scented spray keeps the bugs away, but what do I do about the beavers?'

Confusing directions.

Bear painting signs encouraging people to feed the animals.

Orienteering 101

Metaphors.

Sign at Echo Point - Echo Point Watch Your Step and Your Mouth.

"42 is not the answer to everything, Adams!"

Wishing well out of order - Try wishing upon a star.

'This is where the trail gets a little more challenging.'

Tourists

Wow! Spoon lightning!