Food Explorers Pillows

"I'm not sure our family's ready for kombucha, hon."

'Convenience Product Quarterly calls it 'one of a kind...shattering.''

Excess Baggage: From the 'Travel Promises that never meant to be kept' department.

Come dine with me!

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

6 Brothers Falafel

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

"You owe me five bucks."

Try to guess the continent dining...

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

Before/After

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

"It's probably just seasonal."

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Today: Yogurt Surprise. We call it "yogurt surprise" because we couldn't read the expiration date on the carton.

"But if you leave New Orleans, you'll be just another sandwich."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"Darling, wait until you taste the new year's menu I have ordered for us!"

'Is this still America?'

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

Newark by Night. A new Dutch restaurant just opened. What do you know about Dutch cuisine? Nothing. But I'm a big fan of the "Dutch Treat" concept.

"The pizza came late and it was cold!"

'How was your holiday?' - 'Fantastic! Great weather! Great food! No illness!' - 'So, back to work tomorrow, then?' - 'Yeah, I guess so.' - 'Lousy, germ free holiday.'

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"Hey, …. what's not to like?"

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

Excess Baggage: You never have to worry about finding your way around those humongous new cruise ships. Your stomach will lead you.