First Teaching Position T-Shirts

"I am beginning to think that my student teaching experience may not have completely prepared me for my own classroom."

A Puppet Named Juan

'No Renee, not until you get two degrees, pass a rigorous physical, and beat out thousands of other qualified individuals.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

Pajama Day 743

How to deliver a successful presentation.

A very young man being hired as a groom.

'What begins with 'E'? Well, 'Everything'!'

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

'I don't know what he does, but I'm afraid to ask.'

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

"I see here that you are a recent graduate."

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

'Kiddie school is teaching about sharing; and someone shared their cold with Jennie,'

'I took a couple of years off after college to work on my smirk.'

Staff Yearbook

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

The Paper Route

"That's nice, but do you have any references other than your Mom?"

Responsibility and duties

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

"Here's a manual of our rules and a CD that covers our unwritten rules.

'To them, capital punishment means making them use proper capitalization.'

Boy in toy car talking on phone.

'We're looking for someone who is willing to just do their job.'

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."