Financial Planner In Training Mugs

'You are so mean! If you insist, here's my cheque for half of the licence fee...'

Kid Borrows Money From A Loan Office for His Piggy Bank

'I need a large increase in my allowance, Dad - I'm getting married in a few weeks!'

'I've crunched the numbers and you can afford to increase my allowance by 15.5.'

"Baldo, you need to set a budget for yourself."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

The day the stock market went UP.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

'Office' block tightening it's belt

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

Watering Money

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

"Actual results indicate that the statistical analysis of the data which projections were based on may have been wrong."

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"

"Cash, Jordan. That's what separates man from the apes."

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

'And as my chart clearly shows, I don't know anything.'

Fiscal cliff - US dollar falling over the edge.

European currency on the edge.