Film Nights Prints

"Should we watch the movie whose title we can't remember or the one whose title we can't pronounce?"

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

Horror movies

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

Albert & Myra - The End Story

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Bloody hell!"

"He's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes...like a DOLL'S EYES!!"

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

Star Wars vs Star Trek

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

No, this is the red lagoon, the black one is down the road a bit.

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

"You can tell it's a period drama because they're not wearing ozone helmets."

Do it! Go into the woods alone!...

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

'We're the first film ever in HD 3-D DOUBLE D!'

"I loved the bit where you hid under the seat."

"WOW...this 50.1 theatre sound system makes you feel you're actually in the movie!"

"So is this war movie rated R, rated PG, or rated RPG?"

'No, when something blows up it doesn't buffer, that's just special effects.'

Queen Kong

Cinemuck

I haven't been down there since last Valentine's day. I want to check on a couple who asked me to rekindle their romance. A year ago I told them that thanks to me they'd be spending more time together and less time at their offices. I said I'd make it so they'd have lots of nights at home ordering some take-out and watching a movie. They must be very happy with me. All I did was shoot an arrow of love, but apparently they think I caused some sort of pandemic to happen!

Blockbuster Billion Club

"It was Saturday night. The clock on my office wall showed the time to be eleven-forty-five. There are times when a private eye does not necessarily feel like being a private eye. This was one of those times. The elevator door down the hall clanked open with a clank familiar to anyone on the fourth floor who had had an office on the fourth floor for as long as I had had an office on the fourth floor. Footsteps came down the darkened hall and stopped outside my door. They were the footsteps of a

"Let's see, we bought the giant pop corn, tow giant sodas, and a big box of candy. . . we were lucky the megaplex's loan department was open!"

'I just got the medium popcorn this time.'

'Yeah, my home theater even has spilled drinks and popcorn on the floor.'

"Great idea. Movies are so much better on the big screen."